Let's start light. 

I'm at this weird point in my life, as PubLIZity says, where I craaaave salads. Don’t get me wrong when I’m out in public I’m usually eating baozi, burgers, pizza, etc. But, to me, there is no worse feeling than eating junk food at home when it’s just you and your boyfriend watching Seinfeld reruns on a Friday night. 

I do get pathetically disappointed at the Beijing foreign food scene sometimes, because, for lack of a better term, nobody keeps it real. I am NOT okay with paying 80RMB ($12) for hyped-up trendy restaurants that underserve and overcharge. Will they be closed down in less than a year? Yes. Is everyone there pretending to love it right now? Yes. Do I give a fuck? Kind of.

Here’s the thing, salads rule. It’s the one excuse we get to throw everything into a bowl or plate and not feel like we’re gorging at KFC. Dressings are important, too. Don’t let anyone tell you your dressing should be fat-free. You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life. If you’re going to make a dressing at home, keep the 1:4 ratio in mind. 1/4 cup vinegar or acid to 3/4 oil. Get weird and mix & match oils with vinegars to see what you like. Throw in some  of your favorite seasonings and do the damn thing.

There are a few key ingredients needed to make your salad not suck:

  1. -good greens (or none at all, I’m a big fan of leafless salads, too)
  2. -a fatty dressing (preferably homemade, recipe follows)
  3. -fresh or dried fruit
  4. -nuts or seeds 
  5. -cheese or avocado (or both)
  6. -protein of choice

That’s only six ingredients to make yourself look like you know what you’re doing in a kitchen. 

That said, let’s get to prepping.



Apple Cider Vinaigrette:

  • 3/4 Cup EVOO
  • 1/4 ACV
  • 1 TBSP Honey (or whatever sweetener you like, for my vegan brothers and sisters)
  • 1 TSP Salt
  • 1/2 TSP Garlic Powder
  • 1/2 TSP Paprika (don’t be a wimp)

I just put everything directly into my dressing bottle and make it clap. Let everyone get to know each other. Leave it out of the fridge though, you don’t want the olive oil to solidify and not absorb the other flavors.

For the Salad:

  • Your favorite greens, I used a mixed bag 
  • 10oz chopped chicken breast
  • 1/2  medium honey peach
  • 2 oz gorgonzola 
  • 2 TSP flax seed
  • 1/2 avocado 
  • Salt & Pepper for seasoning

Sauté, grill, bake, boil or whatever your chicken breasts. I sautéed mine in 2TSP of coconut oil because I felt like it, okay?

Season them with whatever you like, I just used salt & pepper, and let them brown on both sides, as pictured, it should take about 10-12 minutes total. 

While your chicken is browning, plate your greens and slice your peaches whichever way you like. Set peaches aside and slice your avocado, set aside.

Once your chicken is finished, chop it up and let it cool off. If you’re really a smart guy, you’d constantly have pre-cooked protein stored in your fridge and dish out 2-minute salads like this dude. 

Shake your dressing and drizzle it over your greens, add your cooled off chicken, layer on the peaches and avocado, followed by the cheese, a nice sprinkle of flax, and then dress it up again with your ACV. Boom. Bam. Gaht. Damn. Look at you, you fancy food-maker.